i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
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