just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
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