Me too!
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
