Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
