every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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