I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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