And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
