I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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