I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
