just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
last night I used snow as a chaser
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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