the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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