I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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