BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
