Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
