we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Acid is not a monday night drug
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
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