Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
