yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
