Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
