So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
