I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You're a waste of cheezeits
I FOUND THE LEGS
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
