she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
