I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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