Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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