I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
