he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
