a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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