that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize