with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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