Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
