guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
is wine microwaveable?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
