You really coming over, don't trick.
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
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