it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize