I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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