pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
