Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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