She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
