umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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