Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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