Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
