I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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