I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
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