Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Randomize
