i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
