just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
