you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Randomize
