David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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