He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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