I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
