And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
