I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
