You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
